I started my speech class on friday. Honestly, I really enjoyed it. On Friday night she gave us an assignment to go sit somewhere and people watch for an hour. We were to record the different type of conversations going on throughout the place and different observations. I, of course, was thrilled because this gave me a perfect excuse to go to my favorite place ever; Starbucks. I got to sit around and read and journal while sipping on my drink. Best. Assignment. Ever.
While I was there and feeling slightly like a creeper writing about the conversations I was watching, a dad and his little 3 or 4 year-old girl walked in. He got his coffee she got her chocolate milk and they went and sat down. Despite the fact that it was loud in the shop and the fact that they were on the polar opposite side of the room from me I could still hear this little girl jabbering about what seemed to me to be absolute nonsense. Her hands would wave around at times that just didn't go with what she was saying and she would pause only long enough to take a breath. The most interesting thing to me about this whole scene was that her dad completely understood every word she was saying. Every hand motion made sense to him, every sentence that would be unintelligeble to an untrained ear, he totally got.
Now, I love the moon. The other week our pastor made the statement that you should find things that help "stir up" your love for God. Well one of the things that always leaves me in awe of God is the moon. A few nights ago I had an overwhelming feeling of loneliness. Being home alone with nothing to do on a regular basis is just not something I'm used to. So laying in bed looking towards the next few months being void of conversation and friendships that I miss was overwhelming. So I grabbed my pillow, blanket, and sleeping bag and went outside to talk to God for a while. It was perfect and clear outside, just like it always seems to be when I'm hurting most. I got to just cry and pour my heart out and share everything that was eating at me and that I'm struggling with.
Believe it or not, this story ties into my Starbucks Adventure. While I was at Starbucks observing the Dad and his little girl I was struck with how much that is like God and us and the conversation I had had with him a few nights before. Things I could try to sit down and explain to other people over and over again, he understands just with my tears. The nonsensical jibberish I talk to him while I'm trying to share what I'm feeling, he just gets. There are things he knows and I don't even have to open my mouth to make him understand. Its the most comforting thought for me right now. I'm known. And not only am I known, but I'm understood. I don't think there is a better way to conquer the feeling of loneliness than to tackle it with that thought.
I know none of that had anything to do with my goals, but I hope it is encouraging to someone, anyone really. Its good just to be reminded as I'm typing it out. On a slightly lighter note: While I was sleeping outside the sprinklers went off at 6am. Ha. I kinda wish we had a video of my disoriented scramble to get inside.
Well I hope y'all have a great week!
James 1:2-4
-Kelly
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